December 1, 2009
New York Times
Well In Month of Giving, a Healthy Reward
By TARA PARKER-POPE
When Cami Walker of Los Angeles learned three years ago that she had multiple sclerosis, her health and her spirits plummeted — until she got an unusual prescription from a holistic health educator.
Ms. Walker, now 36, scribbled the idea in her journal. And though she dismissed it at first, after weeks of fatigue, insomnia, pain and preoccupation with her symptoms, she decided to give it a try. The treatment and her experience with it are summed up in the title of her new book, “29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life” (Da Capo Press).
Ms. Walker gave a gift a day for 29 days — things like making supportive phone calls or saving a piece of chocolate cake for her husband. The giving didn’t cure her multiple sclerosis, of course. But it seems to have had a startling effect on her ability to cope with it. She is more mobile and less dependent on pain medication. The flare-ups that routinely sent her to the emergency room have stopped, and scans show that her disease has stopped progressing.
“My first reaction was that I thought it was an insane idea,” Ms. Walker said. “But it has given me a more positive outlook on life. It’s about stepping outside of your own story long enough to make a connection with someone else.”
And science appears to back her up. “There’s no question that it gives life a greater meaning when we make this kind of shift in the direction of others and get away from our own self-preoccupation and problems,” said Stephen G. Post, director of the Center for Medical Humanities, Compassionate Care and Bioethics at Stony Brook University on Long Island and a co-author of “Why Good Things Happen to Good People” (Broadway, 2007). “But it also seems to be the case that there is an underlying biology involved in all this.”
An array of studies have documented this effect. In one, a 2002 Boston College study, researchers found that patients with chronic pain fared better when they counseled other pain patients, experiencing less depression, intense pain and disability.
Another study, at the Buck Institute for Age Research in Novato, Calif., also found a strong benefit to volunteerism, and after controlling for a number of variables, showed that elderly people who volunteered for more than four hours a week were 44 percent less likely to die during the study period.
How giving can lead to mental and physical changes in health isn’t entirely clear, although studies suggest that altruism may be an antidote to stress. A Miami study of patients with H.I.V. found that those with strong altruistic characteristics had lower levels of stress hormones.
By contrast, being self-centered may be damaging to health. In one study of 150 heart patients, researchers found that people in the study who had more “self-references” (those who talked about themselves at length or used more first-person pronouns) had more severe heart disease and did worse on treadmill tests.
And like Ms. Walker, numerous people have reported feeling better after helping others. A 1988 Psychology Today article dubbed the effect the “helper’s high.” Analyzing two separate surveys of a total of 3,200 women who regularly volunteered, the article described a physical response from volunteering, similar to the results of vigorous exercise or meditation. The strongest effect was seen when the act of altruism involved direct contact with other people.
For Ms. Walker, a former creative director for an advertising agency, most of the gifts involved time, emotional support or small acts of kindness. After the first 29 days, she began a new cycle, a pattern she continues. Neither she nor Mbali Creazzo, the spiritual adviser who taught her about the month of giving, knows why it is 29 days rather than 30 or 31 — it may have something to do with the lunar cycle, which is 29.5 days.
Ms. Walker says she now approaches daily giving as a crucial part of her treatment, just like regular medication. She has also found new purpose in her experience and started a Web site, 29gifts.org, that encourages giving to improve health.
“Giving for 29 days is not suggested as a cure for anything,” Ms. Walker said. “It’s simply a coping mechanism and a simple tool you can use that can help you change your thinking about whatever is going on. If you change your thinking, you change your experience.”
Dr. Post, of Stony Brook, agreed. “To rid yourself of negative emotional states,” he said, “you need to push them aside with positive emotional states.
“And the simplest way to do that is to just go out and lend a helping hand to somebody.”
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Home.
Back in Bucharest, working off jet lag, trying to get back in the swing of things Romanian style and again working off jet lag…coming back east of the Atlantic always hits me harder than going the other way. I had an excellent month of October 2009! I returned home to the USA and Grand Blanc, Michigan for the first time in nearly 2 years.
Family:
The feeling of seeing my family at the airport on the evening of October 1st was something I cannot describe. Granted we talk on the phone every Sunday afternoon, but there is nothing like the real thing! Within the first week of my return my family and I all ventured out to the city of sin, Las Vegas for some sunshine, gambling and good times. We all had a such a great time out there enjoying the warmer weather, the pool, the food, the atmosphere all that a city like Vegas has to offer. It was the first time in a long time we all as a family were together on a vacation, it was nice for everyone to get a little break from Michigan. As much as I love Romania, there is no place like home. Sleeping in my own bed, reading the New York Times in my dads recliner (one of the most comfortable chairs around), sipping on a Starbuck cappuccino at the breakfast table with my Mom & Dad discussing life everything from little things to really big things, joking around with my brother the only way the Kuch boys can, going on shopping expeditions with my sister, 2 year old niece and Mom on a Saturday afternoon like in the old days, reading a book to my niece with her in my lap absorbing everything like sponge and full of innocence, having family pizza night at my sister & brother-in-laws house, Saturday morning breakfast at the Big Boy in town, celebrating my 28th birthday with a cake, candles & cupcakes…all the little things of just being home.
Friends and So Much More:
Out in Vegas, I was able to reconnect with my buddies Adam, who flew in from L.A. for the weekend and Fever, who lives in Vegas (the reason why we went to Vegas in the first place.) It was great catching up, picking up right where we left off. Fever has actually visited me in Romania, in the village for the last two years, so it was a change to see him without horlinka flowing like water. Where as I have not seen Adam since the last time I was state side, which was December 2007. Days were spent by the pool with my family, Tecate, turkey club sandwiches & fruit plates, nights at Playboy Club and Club Moon with way too much Patron…it was great to get the band back together and have some fun. As if Vegas could not get any better, Brynne, who is such a beautiful soul & woman and very special to me, made a trek from Hawaii to sin city to hang out. It was her first time in Vegas. So despite making our rounds to most of the casinos on the strip we also had a night on the town with Fever up at the Playboy club and club Moon at the Palms. We were also able to catch Cirque du Soleil’s “Love” at the Mirage, a celebration of The Beatles, which was spectacular! In Michigan I was able to also catch up with quite of few friends who I had not seen since my adventures to Romania…there was a lot of talk about up coming weddings, jobs and the good ol’ days etc., which is all pretty standard since we are all approaching our late 20’s and these are things people talk about when their in their late 20’s I suppose. Then towards the end of October, I also made a quick two-day trip out to New York City, and absolutely magical city. It was 2 days of fun to say the least. Eating sushi while drinking sake bombs, open bars at private parties at the Bowery Hotel, brunch with bloody maries in the west village for 4 hours, New York Style pizza at 4 a.m. followed by chipotle burritos just a couple hours later for lunch…need I say more!
Bucharest:
It is good to be back in Bucharest where I have a lot of work to catch up on between the two organizations. I was able to speak with my host family in the village a couple of times while state side, but my Romanian is still a bit rusty. So while I am brushing up on that and readapting to life in the big city of Bucharest…I am starting to prepare for the upcoming holiday season. Thanksgiving will be spent back in the village, this time with Brynne as a special guest visitor. Then Christmas holiday off to Morocco to bring in the New Year Moroccan style!
To the journey! S.U.T.W
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
1 year & 10 months
3:45 a.m. Bucharest Otopeni International Airport...in 2 hours and 15 minutes my journey back to the States and more specifically to Grand Blanc, Michigan begins after 1 year & 10 Months abroad!
To the journeys...
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. – Mark Twain
To the journeys...
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. – Mark Twain
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
How does a lamp burn?
"My Bucharest" in bullet points:
- Discovering all sorts of new places, cultures, foods & people
- The authentic Lebanese restaurant 10 mins from my apartment is so delicious and even affordable on a Peace Corps Volunteers budget, not always the case here in Bucharest...they also have hookah (tobacco water pipes) which is great for digestion after a meal of hummus, falafel, tabule and lintel soup.
- Titan park, 2 blocks from my apartment is my weekday morning, before work running spot as well as my weekend escape from the hustle and bustle of Bucharest streets.
- Division of my labor between the Peace Corps office and MaiMultVerde is about 60%/60% thus I sleep well at night!
- I continued my streak of making it to the Black Sea coast each of the summers I have been in Romania...this year was only for a few days and for a conference but I still made it into the sea for a swim and caught some rays on the beaches.
- Romanian culture is so diverse and varied between its different geographical regions...granted the part of the country I spent my last two year in the village is incredibly unique and Bucharest is definitely a different part of Romania than the rest of the country...I think that is so cool.
- Time is flying even faster since moving to Bucharest than it did the last two years...hold on tight!
- I had forgotten how much I enjoy the hidden beauties, chaos, confusion and fun large cities have to offer...I see myself sticking to them for the next couple of years at least...it is just trying to figure out which ones...that is the trickier part.
- An old woman who lives in my block apartment steals all of our mail and then hand delivers it to our door, ha ha, it is pretty funny and I kind of like it...I do have all of my personal mail sent to the Peace Corps office however. I am still not sure how I will explain to the electricity company though that the reason I am paying the bill late is because "grandma" gave me the bill after the pay date, although I would bet they have one of those "grandmas" at their apartment block as well!
- I finished "The Brothers Karamazov" by Fyodor Dostoevsky...brilliant and timeless
- I will be making my 1st trip back to the village this weekend...I am really excited to see all of my friends and family up there, a little concerned about all the food and drink that I will consume Friday, Saturday & Sunday and will be bringing along a separate piece of luggage specifically for all the horlinka I still have up there to bring back down. I have maintained phone call communication with Ion, Angela and the boys on just about an everyday basis since moving down to Bucharest....even my Mom, Dad & Sister in Michigan communicate via email with Angela and the boys, I cant get away with anything, I have eyes watching me all over the world!!
- October 1, 2009 at 15.50 I will be arriving at Bishop International Airport in Flint, Michigan for a one month visit! I am so excited to see my family, my friends and eat all the foods I have missed for the last two years, deliciousness such as burritos, turkey sandwiches, turkey burgers, sushi etc. I am anxious to see how it will be adapting back into life in the states...I used to kind of laugh at the idea of "reverse culture shock" but now I kind of get it.
- Click on these links below...something to think about:
http://www.ted.com/talks/view/id/561
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5GryIDl0qY
- Lastly I will leave you with a passage given to me by true inspiration...
Do you think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary? What we need is to live without getting tired.
How does a lamp burn? Through the continuous input of small drops of oil. What are these drops of oil in our lamps? They are the small things of daily life: faithfulness, punctuality, small words of kindness, a thought for others, our way of being silent, of looking, or speaking, and of acting. These are the true drops of love.
Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies
- Mother Theresa
- Discovering all sorts of new places, cultures, foods & people
- The authentic Lebanese restaurant 10 mins from my apartment is so delicious and even affordable on a Peace Corps Volunteers budget, not always the case here in Bucharest...they also have hookah (tobacco water pipes) which is great for digestion after a meal of hummus, falafel, tabule and lintel soup.
- Titan park, 2 blocks from my apartment is my weekday morning, before work running spot as well as my weekend escape from the hustle and bustle of Bucharest streets.
- Division of my labor between the Peace Corps office and MaiMultVerde is about 60%/60% thus I sleep well at night!
- I continued my streak of making it to the Black Sea coast each of the summers I have been in Romania...this year was only for a few days and for a conference but I still made it into the sea for a swim and caught some rays on the beaches.
- Romanian culture is so diverse and varied between its different geographical regions...granted the part of the country I spent my last two year in the village is incredibly unique and Bucharest is definitely a different part of Romania than the rest of the country...I think that is so cool.
- Time is flying even faster since moving to Bucharest than it did the last two years...hold on tight!
- I had forgotten how much I enjoy the hidden beauties, chaos, confusion and fun large cities have to offer...I see myself sticking to them for the next couple of years at least...it is just trying to figure out which ones...that is the trickier part.
- An old woman who lives in my block apartment steals all of our mail and then hand delivers it to our door, ha ha, it is pretty funny and I kind of like it...I do have all of my personal mail sent to the Peace Corps office however. I am still not sure how I will explain to the electricity company though that the reason I am paying the bill late is because "grandma" gave me the bill after the pay date, although I would bet they have one of those "grandmas" at their apartment block as well!
- I finished "The Brothers Karamazov" by Fyodor Dostoevsky...brilliant and timeless
- I will be making my 1st trip back to the village this weekend...I am really excited to see all of my friends and family up there, a little concerned about all the food and drink that I will consume Friday, Saturday & Sunday and will be bringing along a separate piece of luggage specifically for all the horlinka I still have up there to bring back down. I have maintained phone call communication with Ion, Angela and the boys on just about an everyday basis since moving down to Bucharest....even my Mom, Dad & Sister in Michigan communicate via email with Angela and the boys, I cant get away with anything, I have eyes watching me all over the world!!
- October 1, 2009 at 15.50 I will be arriving at Bishop International Airport in Flint, Michigan for a one month visit! I am so excited to see my family, my friends and eat all the foods I have missed for the last two years, deliciousness such as burritos, turkey sandwiches, turkey burgers, sushi etc. I am anxious to see how it will be adapting back into life in the states...I used to kind of laugh at the idea of "reverse culture shock" but now I kind of get it.
- Click on these links below...something to think about:
http://www.ted.com/talks/view/id/561
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5GryIDl0qY
- Lastly I will leave you with a passage given to me by true inspiration...
Do you think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary? What we need is to live without getting tired.
How does a lamp burn? Through the continuous input of small drops of oil. What are these drops of oil in our lamps? They are the small things of daily life: faithfulness, punctuality, small words of kindness, a thought for others, our way of being silent, of looking, or speaking, and of acting. These are the true drops of love.
Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies
- Mother Theresa
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Quote of the Day...
Strange is our situation here on Earth. Each of us comes for a short visit, not knowing why, yet sometimes seeming to divine a purpose. From the standpoint of daily life, however, there is one thing we do know: that man is here for the sake of other men.
—Albert Einstein
—Albert Einstein
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Bine am gasit!
It has been Four weeks since my move from the village to Bucharest…what are my thoughts? Where to begin?! As hard as it was to leave the village, it was also time for a change of pace for me and boy o boy did I find a change of pace here in Bucharest! No more fieldwork for me…I now spend my time in-between two offices, delivering training sessions to new volunteers, researching potential EU funds for environmental projects while wandering around my new surroundings, getting lost and then found again.
Fortunately, I have been so busy since my arrival in Bucharest, my transition has been pretty natural. Part of me staying with the Peace Corps for a 3rd and moving to Bucharest is I will also be volunteering with local Romanian organization. I was pretty excited about the opportunity of being able to work with a local organization while in Bucharest and was set on gaining some experience in a new field of interest. I had caught wind that a local Environmental NGO in Bucharest expressed interest in working with a volunteer. I was pretty excited about the idea of working in the Environmental sector and getting some new exposures. After reading their website and having my interview with them I was even more enthusiastic about collaborating with them this next year. It was one of the most professional interviews I have ever had in my life…there were four members of the organization who interviewed me all at once, the interview lasted about an hour and twenty one minutes and over 90% of it was all in Romanian. Long story short, I am starting my second week with MaiMultVerde (www.maimultverde.ro) and I am really enjoying myself. As an organization they develop and implement a variety of environmental projects ranging from tree plantation, creating a bike rental company in downtown Bucharest to trash clean ups on mountain trails. I will be assisting with the projects department. Working on developing and then implementing the projects into the Romanian real world. Actually in two days I will participate in my first project. There is an International Jazz Festival in Garana, Romania…I am not really sure where it is but I know it is in the mountains, which is all I need to know! MaiMultVerde will be implementing a recycling/trash clean up program on the grounds of the festival and I will tag along to help out any way possible…as the Peace Corps motto goes “Peace Corps, the toughest job you will ever love!”
My Peace Corps world has also been going very well. As soon as I arrived in Bucharest, I took off to a neighboring city about 90 kms northwest outside of the city to lend a hand at the training sessions of a new group of volunteers that arrived in country at the end of May. I stayed there for two weeks and had a really great time getting to know the new group while being able to reminisce about the good old days when I was fresh off the airplane stepping into a whole new world. It is interesting being on this side of training. It has also allowed me to do some self-reflection on how far I have come since May 2007. I remember all the little challenges that used to consume so much of my efforts and energy…things like ordering food, buying bus tickets, having a casual conversation with people on the streets. Now those one time challenges are just part of my normal everyday life.
However in other ways, I do feel like I am back where I started two years ago as a brand new volunteer in a new land and new environment. Granted, it is a major plus having two years of Romanian “real world” experience under my belt and not to mention my Romanian language skills. However, I am meeting all new people, adapting to an all-new situation and being exposed to a whole new culture…Romania as I knew from the village’s perspective, has done a complete 180-degree turn upside down. I really am getting a whole new perspective of Romania.
Despite being extremely busy with work, I have still found time to take advantage of all that there is to take advantage of in a capital city like Bucharest. I have had a coffee at Starbucks, talked via skype to a good friend who is Japan (my first ever Skype call…It is amazing and FREE!), bought some new “city” clothes at a mall that would put most American malls to shame, saw Santana in concert on 4th of July, played a game of Ultimate Frisbee, have seen two movies at a cinema and was even able to play a little tennis the other day. One thing that I have not had too much ambition to do is to drink any of the 12 liters of horlinka I received as gifts before I left the village. I wont lie it is kind of nice having a bit of a break from it but it really is not the same having a glass of it outside of the village without the scenery, the food, the smells, the long days of field work and most of all without my good friends and family back there. I have talked to Ion, Angela and the boys just about everyday since I have arrived in Bucharest…sometimes even twice in a day…with the last question before we hang up always being “When are you coming back for a visit?”
Again what a different world I am living in these days, but as always I have a smile on my face, curiosity in my soul and new adventures within reach…S.U.T.W
Fortunately, I have been so busy since my arrival in Bucharest, my transition has been pretty natural. Part of me staying with the Peace Corps for a 3rd and moving to Bucharest is I will also be volunteering with local Romanian organization. I was pretty excited about the opportunity of being able to work with a local organization while in Bucharest and was set on gaining some experience in a new field of interest. I had caught wind that a local Environmental NGO in Bucharest expressed interest in working with a volunteer. I was pretty excited about the idea of working in the Environmental sector and getting some new exposures. After reading their website and having my interview with them I was even more enthusiastic about collaborating with them this next year. It was one of the most professional interviews I have ever had in my life…there were four members of the organization who interviewed me all at once, the interview lasted about an hour and twenty one minutes and over 90% of it was all in Romanian. Long story short, I am starting my second week with MaiMultVerde (www.maimultverde.ro) and I am really enjoying myself. As an organization they develop and implement a variety of environmental projects ranging from tree plantation, creating a bike rental company in downtown Bucharest to trash clean ups on mountain trails. I will be assisting with the projects department. Working on developing and then implementing the projects into the Romanian real world. Actually in two days I will participate in my first project. There is an International Jazz Festival in Garana, Romania…I am not really sure where it is but I know it is in the mountains, which is all I need to know! MaiMultVerde will be implementing a recycling/trash clean up program on the grounds of the festival and I will tag along to help out any way possible…as the Peace Corps motto goes “Peace Corps, the toughest job you will ever love!”
My Peace Corps world has also been going very well. As soon as I arrived in Bucharest, I took off to a neighboring city about 90 kms northwest outside of the city to lend a hand at the training sessions of a new group of volunteers that arrived in country at the end of May. I stayed there for two weeks and had a really great time getting to know the new group while being able to reminisce about the good old days when I was fresh off the airplane stepping into a whole new world. It is interesting being on this side of training. It has also allowed me to do some self-reflection on how far I have come since May 2007. I remember all the little challenges that used to consume so much of my efforts and energy…things like ordering food, buying bus tickets, having a casual conversation with people on the streets. Now those one time challenges are just part of my normal everyday life.
However in other ways, I do feel like I am back where I started two years ago as a brand new volunteer in a new land and new environment. Granted, it is a major plus having two years of Romanian “real world” experience under my belt and not to mention my Romanian language skills. However, I am meeting all new people, adapting to an all-new situation and being exposed to a whole new culture…Romania as I knew from the village’s perspective, has done a complete 180-degree turn upside down. I really am getting a whole new perspective of Romania.
Despite being extremely busy with work, I have still found time to take advantage of all that there is to take advantage of in a capital city like Bucharest. I have had a coffee at Starbucks, talked via skype to a good friend who is Japan (my first ever Skype call…It is amazing and FREE!), bought some new “city” clothes at a mall that would put most American malls to shame, saw Santana in concert on 4th of July, played a game of Ultimate Frisbee, have seen two movies at a cinema and was even able to play a little tennis the other day. One thing that I have not had too much ambition to do is to drink any of the 12 liters of horlinka I received as gifts before I left the village. I wont lie it is kind of nice having a bit of a break from it but it really is not the same having a glass of it outside of the village without the scenery, the food, the smells, the long days of field work and most of all without my good friends and family back there. I have talked to Ion, Angela and the boys just about everyday since I have arrived in Bucharest…sometimes even twice in a day…with the last question before we hang up always being “When are you coming back for a visit?”
Again what a different world I am living in these days, but as always I have a smile on my face, curiosity in my soul and new adventures within reach…S.U.T.W
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Au Revoir
Underwear? Check! Passport? Check! Visa? Check! Horlinka? Double Check…at least I am hopeful 10 liters of this stuff will last until next time I make it back to the village for a visit! As far away as this day appeared sometimes over the last two years, it has arrived here on my doorstep. This afternoon I will be making the big move to Bucharest after two years in Poienile Izei. History has a funny way of repeating itself. Just over two years ago, I was sitting at my parent’s computer in Grand Blanc, Michigan unable to sleep writing a blog entry trying to prepare myself for the trans-Atlantic journey to Romania as a Peace Corps Volunteer. Well, here I am again, granted in a bit of a different environment, exhausted after a sleepless night of emotions, trying to prepare myself for yet another 14 hour journey, although this 14 hour journey will not take me across oceans but rather across the beautiful and varied landscape that is Romania! My ridiculously large back pack is stuffed full, my normal size pack back is bulging at the seams and an extra duffle bag is on the verge of a “Heavy Load” sticker...as long as bunica (the grandmother of my host family) does not try to add any more sheep’s cheese, potatoes or garlic to my all ready overflowing collection of our home grown garden I should be fine.
Recently, I would hear myself explain to a neighbor, “Da, o se plec in o saptamana, dar o se fi in Bucurest pentru mai un ani deci pot se vin in apoi pentru visita” and I would think, well at least I still have a week before I leave. Today all of that changed when I climbed on the bus this morning leaving the village for the last time as a volunteer. It has been a whirlwind of a last couple of weeks. First of all, trying to finish up a school year as a teacher is a challenge and from what I can tell that is the case whether you are a teacher in Romania or the United States. I never want to say never, but I have to say I don’t see myself being a middle school teacher, or any kind of teacher for that matter, in the next couple/fifty years! I have total respect and admiration for teachers because now I have been there and I know how challenging and rewarding teaching youth can be. I interviewed each one of my students in a face-to-face English interview. It was very interesting to see the progress many of my students that was in my classes during the last two years with me. It was a nice way to end the year, a very easy "A" for the students, and it allowed me to personally say good-bye to all the little rug rats, even if it was in Romanian! Next on the “Getting ready to move to Bucharest” To Do list was the impossible task of making a point to thank and explain my appreciation to all the great friends I have made in the village over the last two years.
When I arrived in Poienile Izei for the first time I had the same oversized and over stuffed packs, a guitar, an open mind and a smile on my face. The sense of adventure mixed with my eagerness for a new challenge was at the maxim and I knew I had landed in quite a unique place. Despite my confidence and naivety, I was also scared shitless! I was a long way from Sighet, the closest city to the village, let alone from anything that resembled my life back in the States before I left for Romania and I was all alone. Luckily, that feeling of being all alone quickly vanished after met my host family. My first impression of them as great people was way off...they are not great people but rather they are AMAZING people! They welcomed me, a complete stranger from another country into their home and family as if I was a long lost son right from the beginning. It is impossible to explain all the support each one of them have given me since I arrived in the village but as with anything you truly love, you never forget it and no matter how far apart we may be in the years to come Famila Ilies will always have a special spot in my heart. With each and every day, I found and developed my niche as a member of the community and as each and everyday pasted I become more and more integrated and accepted. It would be ridiculous to say my adaptation into the village ways and customs was easy. There were ups and downs, good days and bad days, smiles and tears. Looking back, I think I learned more from the downs, the bad days and the tears than anything else. As all of those challenging moments were always followed by a moment of realization and clarity that kept me motivated, persistent and passionate about what I was doing in the village. But again I had such a great group of friends during my entire time in the village who supported me even if they could not 100% understand what I was going through. Within the hierarchy of the village, I was caught in between two worlds...my service as a teacher at the school entered me into the "professional" atmosphere of the village while living with my host family I was exposed to the self proclaimed "simple" folk. I have to be honest I felt much more at ease and more on par with the "simple" folk in generally speaking. Unfortunately a lot of the “simple” folk get taken for granted and left in the shadows of the younger generation interest in computers and TV and the politics of the village big wigs. As I was saying “good bye” to all my friends and neighbors yesterday, a lot of the credit for people in the village that helped me to adapt into the culture and everyday life of the village was immediately given to the big dogs in the village…Mayor, School director, Priest etc. Don’t get me wrong there were indeed times when these people did assist me, however it were the conversations on the park bench with the 60 and over club on Sunday afternoons, it were the hand blistering trips to the fields and forests with my host family and it were the meals of corn meal, pig fat and horlinka (peasant food) that helped refine my language skills, build real friendships and gave me a sense of belonging in the village. These people, the “simple” folk are the heart & soul of the village and they deserve much more credit they are given and what they will accept. Interestingly enough these same “simple” folk are the ones who, when I gave them a kiss on both sides the cheek and hug good bye and said “thank you so much for all you have done for me,” humbly accepted their compliment and immediately gave the credit to someone else much less deserving.
Thank you Poienile Izei for one hell of a ride, I will see you all soon...watch out Bucharest here I come!
Recently, I would hear myself explain to a neighbor, “Da, o se plec in o saptamana, dar o se fi in Bucurest pentru mai un ani deci pot se vin in apoi pentru visita” and I would think, well at least I still have a week before I leave. Today all of that changed when I climbed on the bus this morning leaving the village for the last time as a volunteer. It has been a whirlwind of a last couple of weeks. First of all, trying to finish up a school year as a teacher is a challenge and from what I can tell that is the case whether you are a teacher in Romania or the United States. I never want to say never, but I have to say I don’t see myself being a middle school teacher, or any kind of teacher for that matter, in the next couple/fifty years! I have total respect and admiration for teachers because now I have been there and I know how challenging and rewarding teaching youth can be. I interviewed each one of my students in a face-to-face English interview. It was very interesting to see the progress many of my students that was in my classes during the last two years with me. It was a nice way to end the year, a very easy "A" for the students, and it allowed me to personally say good-bye to all the little rug rats, even if it was in Romanian! Next on the “Getting ready to move to Bucharest” To Do list was the impossible task of making a point to thank and explain my appreciation to all the great friends I have made in the village over the last two years.
When I arrived in Poienile Izei for the first time I had the same oversized and over stuffed packs, a guitar, an open mind and a smile on my face. The sense of adventure mixed with my eagerness for a new challenge was at the maxim and I knew I had landed in quite a unique place. Despite my confidence and naivety, I was also scared shitless! I was a long way from Sighet, the closest city to the village, let alone from anything that resembled my life back in the States before I left for Romania and I was all alone. Luckily, that feeling of being all alone quickly vanished after met my host family. My first impression of them as great people was way off...they are not great people but rather they are AMAZING people! They welcomed me, a complete stranger from another country into their home and family as if I was a long lost son right from the beginning. It is impossible to explain all the support each one of them have given me since I arrived in the village but as with anything you truly love, you never forget it and no matter how far apart we may be in the years to come Famila Ilies will always have a special spot in my heart. With each and every day, I found and developed my niche as a member of the community and as each and everyday pasted I become more and more integrated and accepted. It would be ridiculous to say my adaptation into the village ways and customs was easy. There were ups and downs, good days and bad days, smiles and tears. Looking back, I think I learned more from the downs, the bad days and the tears than anything else. As all of those challenging moments were always followed by a moment of realization and clarity that kept me motivated, persistent and passionate about what I was doing in the village. But again I had such a great group of friends during my entire time in the village who supported me even if they could not 100% understand what I was going through. Within the hierarchy of the village, I was caught in between two worlds...my service as a teacher at the school entered me into the "professional" atmosphere of the village while living with my host family I was exposed to the self proclaimed "simple" folk. I have to be honest I felt much more at ease and more on par with the "simple" folk in generally speaking. Unfortunately a lot of the “simple” folk get taken for granted and left in the shadows of the younger generation interest in computers and TV and the politics of the village big wigs. As I was saying “good bye” to all my friends and neighbors yesterday, a lot of the credit for people in the village that helped me to adapt into the culture and everyday life of the village was immediately given to the big dogs in the village…Mayor, School director, Priest etc. Don’t get me wrong there were indeed times when these people did assist me, however it were the conversations on the park bench with the 60 and over club on Sunday afternoons, it were the hand blistering trips to the fields and forests with my host family and it were the meals of corn meal, pig fat and horlinka (peasant food) that helped refine my language skills, build real friendships and gave me a sense of belonging in the village. These people, the “simple” folk are the heart & soul of the village and they deserve much more credit they are given and what they will accept. Interestingly enough these same “simple” folk are the ones who, when I gave them a kiss on both sides the cheek and hug good bye and said “thank you so much for all you have done for me,” humbly accepted their compliment and immediately gave the credit to someone else much less deserving.
Thank you Poienile Izei for one hell of a ride, I will see you all soon...watch out Bucharest here I come!
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